Ingredients
Balls for 12
4 large banana shallots
8 garlic cloves
4 tablespoons of light olive oil plus 6 more for frying the balls
4 stalks of rosemary
1400g of lamb mince
200g of white breadcrumbs
100ml whole milk
flaked salt and ground black pepper
lightly seasoned plain flour
Extra virgin olive oil and Parmesan to serve

Tomato sauce
2.4kg ripe tomatoes (consider buying a few days before you need them so they can soften up)
2 tablespoon olive oil
600ml red wine
Juice of 2 lemons
4 tablespoons of tomatoe purée
4 tablespoons of flaked sea salt
2 tablespoons of caster sugar
2 cinnamon sticks

Gremolata
4 garlic cloves
2-3 large handfuls of flat leaf parsley
Finely grated zest of two unwaxed lemons

Method

Ok, before getting started on this dinner party request be aware THIS WILL TURN INTO A FARCE WITHOUT THE RIGHT KITCHEN STUFF.

Question – do you have a heavy based le creuset with a lid? You need AT LEAST one. Maybe even two for this many balls… Also if doing pasta (and I think you should try) you will need 2-3 hefty saucepans. Buy some.

This will take a while (for you for sure) I know you got time but no skills but still START EARLY. Even better do it the day before.

Ok here goes…

1. Valentine says start with the sauce, cut a small cross with a sharp knife at the bottom of each tomato. Place them in a large pan or mixing bowl and pour over just boiled water and leave for at least one minute. Take each tomato out and peel off the skin. Chop the tomatoes smallish.

2. At this point either get one massive pot on or use two and divide all the sauce quantities equally between the two. Put the 2 tablespoons of olive oil into the pan add the tomatoes to the pan when the oil is hot enough to sizzle. Fry the tomatoes for 2-3 mins until softened. Add the wine, lemon juice, tomato purée, salt and sugar. Bring to a gentle simmer and cook for 20 mins.

3. While the sauce is going pre-heat the oven to 170 degrees and make the balls. Peel and finely chop the shallots and garlic, then fry them in 4 tablespoons of olive oil until totally soft. Put in a very large mixing bowl. Strip the rosemary leaves from the stalks and chop finely. Add to the bowl with the lamb mince, a good grating of nutmeg, the breadcrumbs and the milk. Add plenty of salt and pepper and mix well with your hands.

4. Roll into 48 balls between your palms (this is a task and you could do this a day or so ahead of when you start cooking. This is probably a two man task or you might kill yourself. Leave in the fridge under clingfilm at this point if you are making ahead. If cooking now put the seasoned flour on a plate and roll your balls in it.

4. Fry in a frying pan over a high heat so they brown quickly but don’t cook through. It is important that the pan is not over crowded – suggest do in batches. Removing each batch and placing on kitchen paper to remove excess oil.

5. Nestle your balls into the tomato sauce add the cinnamon stick and cover with a lid. Send to the oven for an hour. Remove from oven turn the meatballs over and return to the oven for a further 30 mins. The meatballs are very very tender so try not to break them.

Cook a lot of spaghetti (150g per person ish?) stir together or serve pasta and then balls in the middle or both in the middle

6. Just before serving make the Gremolata. Super finely chop the garlic and parsley and mix with the grated lemon zest. Scatter the meatballs with this a good lug of extra virgin olive oil and Parmesan.

YUM. You will arse it up. Call me.

(Leftovers in a lightly toasted baguette with American mustard raw onion and tomato) wha? Amz.

Pasta photo mine – close up of valentine Warner’s balls and face from his book “What to eat now, more please”